'I could not understand why I loved men. I loved the way they talked, walked and their body shapes'

Zenoyise Madikwa

Zenoyise Madikwa

"Why am I gay?"

Somizi Mhlongo, one of the people outspoken about their homosexuality, says that he knew from a very young age that he was gay, but he suppressed these feelings for years.

The father of one said he believes he was born gay but only started knowing about it when he was 15.

"I could not understand why I loved men. I loved the way they talked, walked and their shape. I think when I fell in love it all became so much more concrete for me.

"I was suddenly very certain of what I wanted and why I wanted it."

Mhlongo says for years he had relationships with women but that he was unhappy.

"I felt trapped inside of me. During those days homosexuality was taboo. I did not want my family to know because I did not want them to disown me.

"So when I was independent I decided to come out of the closet. To my surprise my mother was supportive."

Why does he like men?

Mhlongo says men are easy to deal with.

"There is no nagging and men are financially and emotionally independent which makes things easy for both partners.

"There is not too much talking and each person foots their own bill. Nobody spends and expects you to pay. Unlike women, men do their own thing and there is less stress."

And sex?

Mhlongo says many people think that gay relationships are about sex but they are not.

"Sex is sex whether you are doing it with a woman or a man. There is no difference. The only difference is the person you are doing it with. It is all about attraction.

"Some are attracted to both sexes. They are happily married with kids but they still sleep with men."

Mhlongo, who was dating an engaged bisexual soccer player, said many gay men prefer bisexuals.

When he was interviewed, Mhlongo was not yet born again.

But he recently told Sowetan that he had now accepted Jesus Christ as his saviour but that he is still gay.

He said he used to go to church but did not have a revelation of who God was. He said Pastor Kabelo Mabalane aka Bouga Luv led him to Christ.

"I looked at his lifestyle and I realised that if God could change him he could change me too."

Mhlongo says though he was no longer dating and sleeping with men he was still gay.

"I believe that God created me this way, He loves me this way and I will die this way.

"All I want to do is to concentrate on my spirituality and on serving God.

"I am not doing the boyfriend and sex thing anymore. I'm waiting for Mr Right to come along and marry me."