MY COLLEAGUE Zenoyise Madikwa recently probed the possibility of friendship between members of the opposite sex. She felt such friendships were possible. I disagree.

MY COLLEAGUE Zenoyise Madikwa recently probed the possibility of friendship between members of the opposite sex. She felt such friendships were possible. I disagree.

I'm all for the changes that men have to undergo as a result of evolution and the recent undoing of our traditional roles.

I'm all for stay-at-home dads, metrosexuals, earning less than the missus and all the emasculating tendencies of contemporary society. But the notion of men having female friend remains as implausible as in the old days.

It is highly improbable that a man's first thought on meeting a beautiful woman is: "Wow, I wish I could be her friend!"

There are exceptions and there are guys who have genuine platonic relationships with women. How they got into such a predicament plagues them whenever they are with the incredible dame.

And when guys ask whether they can date his pretty "friend", he discourages them .

This spot of bother can be traced to the moment when you first set lustful eyes on her figure. You should have made your intentions clear right there and then. But you instead speak to her at length and realise there is more to her than the one-night stand you were planning.

A date ensues. You are in awe of her intelligence and wit. She was utterly comfortable with you and you get on like old friends.

You keep the conversation simple and general, without any hint of your romantic desires. The date ends but you meet again. No relationship talk and no kissing.

At some point you convince yourself that she is really your friend and you'd rather have her as a friend than not at all.

Then, one night after watching one romantic comedy too many with alcohol in your system, you pluck up the courage to reveal your feelings.

She is shocked and feels betrayed. WHAT? After lending her a shoulder to cry on in the the rebound from her cheating boyfriend you come up with this nonsense. What a nerve, sies!

You ignore her for a few weeks. This works initially, but you begin to miss her terribly. And after another Hollywood movie and counsel from your gay friend, you give her a call and pledge to remain friends. And all goes back to normal. You convince yourself that you are mature and you can be friends with women.

Alas, other guys come along and jealousy creeps up again. You suppress it and tell her to meet them, just to prove you are over her. Her faith in you is restored.

What she doesn't know is, given half a chanc, you would bed her. have a relationship, whatever.