In over your head? Heed the signs - toxic cash habits are learnt

You can't choose your family, but you can choose the way you manage your money.

Have you noticed that youngsters who come from homes where good financial habits were practised often follow the same path when they are older? Guess what?

Youngsters from homes with less than healthy financial habits often do the same.

How we relate to money is an important part of our upbringing, we tend to mimic our parents' behaviour.

For instance, a young woman I spoke to recently told me that her mom believes that "budgeting makes you cheap and if you budget you will never have money for pampering yourself".

Her dad apparently says that "budgeting is a waste of time because there are always things that come up and cannot be planned for".

Can you imagine if this young woman also had these toxic habits?

Here's the thing: you cannot choose your family, but you can choose the way you manage your finances.

Yes, we want our parents and families to be shining examples of how to best manage money, but the truth is they are also human and their approaches can be flawed.

Be warned of the following toxic money behaviours, the psychological motivations behind those habits and what you can do to break free of them.

Toxic behaviour 1

Living in denial: Have you seen a person who completely ignores mail and does not open it for months?

This is classic avoidance.

This is the mind's way of avoiding what it anticipates will be uncomfortable or provoke anxiety.

This behaviour provides temporary relief while doing nothing for overall stress and anxiety.

Shake this habit off by thinking about how you will feel once you have cleared the bills off your table and attended to the most important things.

Better still, arrange debit orders to pay your bills on time so you don't have to worry about opening envelopes.

Toxic behaviour 2

Embracing debt: Many people have accepted that debt is "normal" and that "credit is the only way to live".

This is caused by living from pay cheque to pay cheque.

It is when there is no culture of saving and being blinded by survival issues that debt becomes the norm.

In this cycle people are no longer able to see a brighter future, hence they are stuck in the cycle of work and bills.

Shake this habit off by making sure you are up to date with your debt payments.

Pay off debt as quickly as possible and start putting away savings, even if it's R100 or R50 each week to save that money for your emergency fund.

When debt is paid off, you will have a nice cash cushion to start investing.

Toxic behaviour 3

Quit budgeting: If you get into the habit of not worrying about how much you spend on what and continue to treat yourself - buying items such as duvet covers, clothes and smart phones, which you can't afford - you will continue to ball-park everything and overspend every month. You will never know how to track your income and expenses.

This attitude is caused by a need to feel fulfilled, to feel complete or special. In a nutshell, this is about feeling inadequate.

Shake this habit off by being conscious that money doesn't just appear from nowhere.

Know where your money goes in order to get a sense of how much you really have to spend and when to stop mindless spending.

These toxic behaviours are sabotaging your own financial success.

thedream@winniekunene.co.za