She left me and our small children

MY girlfriend and I have been living together for five years and we have two very small children. I have a good job and feel that I have provided for her and our children very well.

I love her very much and thought she loved me. A month ago, I arrived home to find that she had packed her belongings and left our children with a neighbour.

She told the neighbour she had met someone new who promised her heaven and earth. She said she would pick up the children sometime in the future.

I cannot believe she has been so utterly cruel. She can leave me, but how can she leave her children? They cry and continually ask for her. What am I meant to say to them? How am I going to cope with two small children?

I have tried everything to find out where she is, but I cannot trace her. I feel so ashamed of what she has done and I don't know what to tell my family and friends. I am devastated and feel that I no longer want to go on with life. Devastated, Joburg

Dudu responds,

 am so sorry that this has happened and understand that you don't want to go on with life, but you will have to.

I am sure you love your children and want the best for them. They need you to love and protect them. You have nothing to be ashamed of. It is understandable that your children miss their mother.

Though you are disappointed, hurt and angry, it is important that you don't talk badly about her to them. Tell your family and close friends the truth. You are going to need their support with looking after your children. Try to develop a stable routine for them, which will ensure their stability and happiness.

You must be feeling overwhelmed, but reach out to those who care for you and ask for help. You should also seek legal advice on the custody of your children. It would not be fair on them or you if your girlfriend thinks she can just fetch them "sometime in the future".

Contact Lifeline on 011-728-1347.