Pegging simply means some men like it from the rear

Some  men enjoy being dominated by a woman during  sex.  /  123RF
Some men enjoy being dominated by a woman during sex. / 123RF

Anal penetration during sex is not just for homosexual males. Straight men also enjoy the experience through pegging.

In pegging, a man is penetrated by his female partner during sex. Sex trends around the world show that pegging is gaining momentum in popularity among daring couples.

Sexpert Dr P Ratshabedi says pegging can be achieved via sex toys, fingers or fists, depending on the couple's preferences.

A woman would wear a strap-on dildo, pleasuring the man from the rear.

Tracey Cox reveals in the Daily Mail that 20 years ago everyone's reaction was "What! My boyfriend/husband is not gay, why the hell would he want me to do that to him?" But Cox says with it being the hottest sex trend in 2016 as well as this year, it is far from being a fad.

In fact, she points out that it is nothing new as ancient drawings demonstrate the act of pegging.

In 2001, a United States sex commentator, Dan Savage, author of the Savage Love column, held a contest to come up with a name for the practice.

Fifty Shades of Grey broke the stereotype of lovemaking and being unashamed.
Fifty Shades of Grey broke the stereotype of lovemaking and being unashamed.

Sunday World quizzed individuals on social media to find out if this practice floats their boat. Although most men rubbished the sexual method, some men confidentially spoke to Sunday World about why they like pegging.

A 27-year-old man, who wants to be known only as Kamogelo, described pegging as a preference.

"My girlfriend has her own sexual preferences, sometimes she wants me to just go down on her until she reaches orgasm because my penetration does not give her the same orgasm she gets from this.

"So, when I introduced her to sex toys, she was fascinated. I told her I wanted to be penetrated with a dildo and when she did it, I reached climax in the most satisfactory manner. I have never felt like that before; it was amazing," said Kamogelo.

He says at first his girlfriend asked if he were gay.

"I assured her I would not be with her if I were gay. I just enjoy sex when I'm being penetrated."

Phindile Ngubane says she had an experience with a man who loved anal sex.

"We would be intimate and he would turn me and penetrate me from behind. I was not comfortable and we spoke about it.

"He told me if I'm not comfortable then he can buy a toy so I can penetrate him from behind," says Ngubane.

Ngubane says she started reading about why men want to be penetrated.

"I loved him a lot, so you can imagine that I did everything I could to make our sex life interesting and fulfilling."

Ngubane admits she often enjoyed this type of kinky sex.

"We played in opposite directions, a position called '6-9'. So while I'm penetrating him with my hand, he would be going down on me so we would both reach orgasm. I loved it but eventually got tired because he wanted nothing else.

"One day, I asked him that we should go back to our missionary position and he refused. He became a receiver and that suffocated our relationship. I stopped enjoying sex because I felt like a man doing all the work. I thought he was gay, but until this day, he is still with a woman and they are married with kids," Ngubane says.

Ratshabedi says pegging serves to stimulate the prostate gland. And gay and straight men find this enjoyable, Ratshabedi says.

He adds historically society has placed people in boxes to limit their sexuality.

"There is so much pressure for men to be sexual leaders in society, to play certain sexual roles. We end up having men who get married to cover up and end up living unhappy lives," says Ratshabedi.

The sexpert says he has crossed paths with men who got into marriages with women but frequented gay bars and clubs to find people who will not judge them for wanting to explore their sexuality. However, some men say they experiment with pegging to satisfy their fantasies.

"It had nothing to do with being gay or hiding my sexuality. As men we have fantasies. I have been in a situation where I wanted to have sex with three women. I had the chance to live that fantasy. I asked that they penetrate me using their fists.

"It is just the feeling of wanting to feel how women feel when we are inside them. I wanted to know how deep should I go to reach her G-spot. Trust me after that experience, I know my body very well," says Keegan, adding the act went on to be addictive.

"I won't lie though. After that experience, I wanted to feel like that often, but I never ever considered exploring it with men. I bought myself a dildo and started using it [on me].

"I hid it from my girlfriend because when we spoke about our fantasies and I mentioned a woman penetrating me, she cringed, so I left it alone," Keegan says.

Men who prefer being penetrated say it is also about reaching a climax that one does not reach when they are having what society deems as "normal sex".

"A vibrator or a fist stimulates my prostate gland, so for me it is about filling the sexual void. It is just sad because when you talk about it with some friends think you are gay.

"I believe not all straight guys who sleep with gay guys are gay. Gay guys just give us what our girlfriends do not want to give us," he says.

Boledi Kekana says her relationship of five years ended because there was no common ground for sex positions.

Sex toys come in all sorts of shapes,  sizes and colours to spice up lovemaking.
Sex toys come in all sorts of shapes, sizes and colours to spice up lovemaking.

"It was actually an eye-opening experience for me. I did not think sex could change our relationship like that. My boyfriend loved doggy style when we met in 2010 .

"I made peace with it. But as time went on, I realised it was about him, our bedroom life was about what he wanted and I felt like his sex toy, not his partner," says Kekana. "When I was still getting used to this position he took me by surprise by going straight for the anus. It was painful and I stopped him.

"We discussed it and he said he would stop. The other time we were doing foreplay and he took my fist and put it in his anus. Man, I freaked out. We spoke about it again and I got used to it," she says.

Kekana says even though she got used to it, she never enjoyed it.

"I started cheating on him. The guy I was with was making love to me in ways that I know, so I ended up leaving my boyfriend for my new lover.

"I think discovering that your lover is into pegging is traumatising but for other women it is normal," says Kekana.

Ratshabedi says sexual preferences have been there since the dawn of time.

"There are even gay women who enjoy being penetrated, does that make them straight women? No. It is a sexual preference," Ratshabedi says.

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