Karabo’s uncle says mothers shouldn’t allow their children to be controlled by men

People arrive at the memorial service of Karabo Mokoena in Diepkloof, Soweto. picture: Alaister Russell/The Times
People arrive at the memorial service of Karabo Mokoena in Diepkloof, Soweto. picture: Alaister Russell/The Times

The uncle of slain Karabo Mokoena has warned mothers not to allow their children to be controlled by men.

Closing off his niece’s memorial service held in Diepkloof‚ Soweto‚ on Wednesday afternoon‚ Tshepo Mokoena gave some stern advice to the mothers in the hall.

“You‚ as mothers‚ let us work together with the fathers and let us be one unit. When a girl child is unemployed or still in school‚ and she brings all those expensive bags‚ while she isn’t working‚ as a mother‚ because you will always see her first‚ just ask her to return those things where they come from‚” said Mokoena.

“Because immediately when you accept these things‚ you are setting up a wrong precedence. You are giving power to that young man over your child because that young man thinks he owns your child.

Family, friends gather for Karabo Mokoena's memorial

“Because do you know what makes a young man fight a girl? He says I give you things‚ therefore I can call you at anytime. I can make you bunk school. I can call you whenever I want. That is exactly what happens in universities‚” Mokoena said.

Ironically‚ also present among the hundreds who had come to mourn Karabo was self-confessed blesser‚ Serge Cabonge‚ who rose to fame after he was profiled on the television programme‚ Checkpoint.

Meanwhile‚ Mokoena also pleaded with mothers to allow fathers to have a say in the household.

Karabo would want you to forgive her killer‚ says her friendIf Karabo Mokoena was here‚ she would ask that you forgive her murderer.

“At times‚ when men try to reprimand the children; the woman will say‚ ‘but you also used to do these things in your youth.’ They are giving power to the child‚” he said.

He was the only speaker who had tough words of advice directed to the women in the audience.

Many of the other speakers‚ including veteran actor Patrick Shai‚ spoke out about how men were failing the girl child in society.

Shai‚ who has in the past been vocal about how he used to abuse his wife‚ on Wednesday told mourners that it was time to end the hashtags and jump into action‚ particularly from men in the audience.

“I changed from being a domestic violence perpetrator to being the person that I am today. If I could do it‚ why would it be impossible for South African men to do that?” Shai said.

“I look at the boy who has done this deed and I say it could be my son tomorrow. It could be your son tomorrow‚” he added.

The boy he was speaking about was Sandile Mantsoe‚ Karabo’s boyfriend who has been arrested in connection with her murder.

Karabo’s body was burnt beyond recognition in a ditch in Lyndhurst on 29 April‚ a day after she was last seen by her friends and family.

Her family searched for her‚ even pleading for assistance on social media.

According to the Mokoena family‚ Mantsoe confessed to the crime last week and that led to him being formally charged with premeditated murder and defeating the ends of justice.

Neo Mohlabane‚ a friend of Karabo’s‚ spoke about how she had seen her bruised a few days before her murder after allegedly being assaulted by Mantsoe.

Karabo’s spiritual counsellor‚ Dr Adele Tjale‚ also spoke about how Karabo had one occasion come to her home “battered”.

While Mantsoe is yet to plead‚ Mohlabane said Karabo would have forgiven him for his actions.

 

 

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