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How Gospel star survived abuse

By Classic Mashiloane | Dec 12, 2012 | COMMENTS [ 65 ]

Get help, says inspirational singer who has revealed her own sad past

GOSPEL star Fikile Mlomo is one of South Africa's most inspirational women. In her long-awaited album Noma Kunje, released in October, the singer revealed how she survived abuse.

Mlomo, who hails from Lindelani informal settlement outside Durban in KwaZulu-Natal, said: "I had a rough childhood because at home my mother and grandmother could not afford to buy us many things".

Because her family was poor, Mlomo dropped out of Grade 11 to live with her 21-year-old boyfriend.

"I was only 15 when I entered the abusive relationship and fell pregnant at the age of 16.

"My boyfriend at that time used to beat me up for nothing after he had been drinking liquor. He would come back home late from shebeens and accuse me of things I had not done. Then, when I would defend myself, he would beat me."

She said the abuse continued and the boyfriend would apologise while cleaning her wounds.

This continued until she lost her four-month-old baby.

"Even when I was pregnant, the same routine of abuse would go on until I was admitted to hospital. I delivered the baby prematurely. Miraculously, my baby survived until at one fight we had, she died on the scene."

Mlomo said because she loved him, she stayed at his house until all the wounds had healed and would then go back home as if nothing had happened.

Mlomo said after breaking up with her first boyfriend, she dated again.

"I had hoped to find love and trust again, but to my surprise, the new man was also emotionally abusive."

She said that she entered into an abusive relationship for the wrong reasons, "because I depended on other people".

Earlier this year, Mlomo was diagnosed with TB.

"I had to delay the recording of my third album for almost eight months due to the TB treatment."

She advised women to speak out against woman and child abuse, and ensure that they get help.

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COMMENTS [ 65 ]

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@ Blackwomen so we are judgemental when we blame someone for moving in with a guy at 15? She shouldn’t have done that in the first place and give an excuse of being poor? More than 70% of black families are poor, so what you are saying here is that girls born in such families should just go cohabitate? & wena you also want us to sympathise with you and stop “judging”, as you fondly put it, when you went and moved in with a guy when you, yourself had a privileged life than most , you finished your tertiary studies and instead of making life better for yourself you moved in with a guy? What you don’t tell us is that your parents might have warned you against moving in with a guy and you went on and did that.
We are so tired of people who are not wise enough to learn from other people’s mistakes and just out of ignorance & inkani just do things which will harm them in the end and then will come back and say “we must not judge”

Dec 13, 2012 2:57 | 0 replies

@ The Genius, kwaaaaaaaaak, thats why celebrities run away from your likes cos you blocking their way of milking the unsuspecting public by being explicit in telling the truth, I am just wondering when did she became a star? Fikile and her like wants to use gospel ukukhuthuza abantu.

Dec 12, 2012 11:31 | 0 replies

Serene
But this sound different from what u said on metro fm
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
I can still maintain that the lady is taking chances how do you sleep and have sex while nursing your injuries then have a miscarriage where was the police station far such that one wont manage to walk to report the abuse some people are too opportunistic where were her friends, colleques and passersby priests teachers to report the abuse wa re gafela wena ngwanyana ftsheek

Dec 12, 2012 11:11 | 0 replies

SWEETYK
No my love, as for me I am sick and tired of this abuse abuse abuse nonsense. They are just trying to steal the limelight about this ABUSE sh!t.

Dec 12, 2012 11:2 | 0 replies

Dubul'Amanzi
TheGenius
Fikile should be honest and tell us that "My boyfriend and I would always fight when we were drunk." Why do all these so-called celebrities blame all the people for their past mistakes except themselves.

For the record, Fikile still drinks heavily and she fights when she is drunk. Who is she going to blame now?

We are tired of people who want us to feel sorry for them by blaming other people but themselves. The fact is: Wena Fikile you ran away to live with you boyfriend because you get drunk very well together, and you still drink to this day, and now you claim to be an angel - a drinking angel. At the moment when your boyfriend slept with you, what were you doing? Crying abuse? Drinking?
**
Lol are really a genius.
=============================================

Dubul' Amanzi nsizw' enye ngiyazibongela bhung' elisha. Phela iqiniso abalifuni laba onontandwakubukwa. Nami ngisho engikwaziyo. Kungenzeka nje kwale interview wayenza ebukhile...

Dec 12, 2012 11:1 | 0 replies

There is too much exploitation and abuse of kids from poor families.

Dec 12, 2012 11:1 | 0 replies

Missjoy
Thanks you too, mind if I give u my "fake" email then will give you the correct one later?
**************************************************************************
ungihlekiselani kangaka lol?

Lets just say u will give me the correct one next year. ( 14/01/2013) never mind the 'fake one'
***
Lol ok then but I don't think I can give my correct email here on Sowetan unfortunately.

Dec 12, 2012 11:0 | 0 replies

Miraculously, my baby survived until at one fight we had, she died on the scene
___________________________________________________________________

but this sound different from what u said on metro fm a few weeks ago in a onterview with Thami?

Dec 12, 2012 10:59 | 0 replies

Thanks you too, mind if I give u my "fake" email then will give you the correct one later?
**************************************************************************
ungihlekiselani kangaka lol?

Lets just say u will give me the correct one next year. ( 14/01/2013) never mind the 'fake one'

Dec 12, 2012 10:57 | 0 replies

story was published 3 months ago on Sowetan

Dec 12, 2012 10:56 | 0 replies

TheGenius
Fikile should be honest and tell us that "My boyfriend and I would always fight when we were drunk." Why do all these so-called celebrities blame all the people for their past mistakes except themselves.

For the record, Fikile still drinks heavily and she fights when she is drunk. Who is she going to blame now?

We are tired of people who want us to feel sorry for them by blaming other people but themselves. The fact is: Wena Fikile you ran away to live with you boyfriend because you get drunk very well together, and you still drink to this day, and now you claim to be an angel - a drinking angel. At the moment when your boyfriend slept with you, what were you doing? Crying abuse? Drinking?
**
Lol are really a genius.

Dec 12, 2012 10:52 | 0 replies