SOMETIMES we make bad decisions in our love lives and live to regret it.
SABC1 is creating a reality show in which couples will get a chance to reveal secrets on air.
Nyan' Nyan', which means truth in isiXhosa, will give young couples a forum to re-evaluate their relationships.
Still in production, the show will focus on the romantic relationships of 24-to 35-year-old couples dealing with love and marriage issues.
It will also offer intervention from a qualified relationship expert who will help couples build better relationships.
One couple that is dealing with relationship challenges is Ntombifuthi Ngubane*, 23, and Bafana Dlamini*, 26, from Soweto.
They have been together for more than four years, but split up for about seven months in 2009 because of infidelity.
"People in our neighbourhood told me things about Bafana. Our relationship was fine, but he was just greedy," Ngubane says.
She hit back by dating other men.
"We fought a lot. The trust was gone, so we broke up. This left a huge scar in my heart. It has still not healed. I'm praying now," she says.
Dlamini admits his mistakes and says he has paid dearly for them.
"I realised that I was selfish and inconsiderate. She doesn't trust me anymore. She thinks everything I say or do is an excuse to cheat ," he says.
They have learnt that "keeping secrets is not healthy".
Their limping love survives by them spending more time together and being honest and open.
Dlamini warns unfaithful lovers: "The lies will catch up with you".
Relationship expert Anri van der Berg of Vita Nova shares some advice.
"Trust is one of the cornerstones of a healthy relationship. Unfortunately, it is easily broken and really hard to regain - but not impossible.
"If you are trustworthy in the small things, you should also be trustworthy in the big things. When trying to regain your partner's trust, be an open book," she says.
"Rebuilding trust means you are starting from scratch. No passwords on computers, cellphones or Ipads, just complete transparency when it comes to e-mails and SMSes."
"Couples should set aside a specific time to discuss the issue, rather than just hitting your partner with questions, anger and accusations every day," Van der Berg says.
She says prevention is better than cure, so work on your relationship continuously.
"Do not even allow the thought of a third party into your relationship. Keep the emotional connections between the two of you strong and healthy by focusing on the little things."
- monnakgotlam@sowetan.co.za
TV show will help lovers stay together
SOMETIMES we make bad decisions in our love lives and live to regret it.
SABC1 is creating a reality show in which couples will get a chance to reveal secrets on air.
Nyan' Nyan', which means truth in isiXhosa, will give young couples a forum to re-evaluate their relationships.
Still in production, the show will focus on the romantic relationships of 24-to 35-year-old couples dealing with love and marriage issues.
It will also offer intervention from a qualified relationship expert who will help couples build better relationships.
One couple that is dealing with relationship challenges is Ntombifuthi Ngubane*, 23, and Bafana Dlamini*, 26, from Soweto.
They have been together for more than four years, but split up for about seven months in 2009 because of infidelity.
"People in our neighbourhood told me things about Bafana. Our relationship was fine, but he was just greedy," Ngubane says.
She hit back by dating other men.
"We fought a lot. The trust was gone, so we broke up. This left a huge scar in my heart. It has still not healed. I'm praying now," she says.
Dlamini admits his mistakes and says he has paid dearly for them.
"I realised that I was selfish and inconsiderate. She doesn't trust me anymore. She thinks everything I say or do is an excuse to cheat ," he says.
They have learnt that "keeping secrets is not healthy".
Their limping love survives by them spending more time together and being honest and open.
Dlamini warns unfaithful lovers: "The lies will catch up with you".
Relationship expert Anri van der Berg of Vita Nova shares some advice.
"Trust is one of the cornerstones of a healthy relationship. Unfortunately, it is easily broken and really hard to regain - but not impossible.
"If you are trustworthy in the small things, you should also be trustworthy in the big things. When trying to regain your partner's trust, be an open book," she says.
"Rebuilding trust means you are starting from scratch. No passwords on computers, cellphones or Ipads, just complete transparency when it comes to e-mails and SMSes."
"Couples should set aside a specific time to discuss the issue, rather than just hitting your partner with questions, anger and accusations every day," Van der Berg says.
She says prevention is better than cure, so work on your relationship continuously.
"Do not even allow the thought of a third party into your relationship. Keep the emotional connections between the two of you strong and healthy by focusing on the little things."
- monnakgotlam@sowetan.co.za
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