Tue Sep 02 06:17:51 SAST 2014

'Better sex life linked to division of housework'

By Reuters | Jan 31, 2013 | COMMENTS [ 35 ]

Dear Husband: Be warned that not helping at all, may affect your woman's libido

Couples wanting to improve their sex lives may want to look at how they divide household chores, because men and women who follow traditional roles have sex more often than other couples, researchers say.

In a study that analyzed the roles of 4,500 heterosexual married couples in the United States, researchers found that when women handled the cooking, cleaning and shopping, and men did yard work and car maintenance, they had more active sex lives.

“The results show that gender still organizes quite a bit of everyday life in marriage,” Julie Brines, a University of Washington associate professor of sociology and a co-author of the study, said in a statement. “In particular, it seems that the gender identities husbands and wives express through the chores they do also help structure sexual behaviour.”

The findings, which are published in the American Sociological Review journal, showed that couples with traditional roles at home had sex 1,6 times more per month than those in which the husband did all the traditionally female work.

But Brines and her colleagues said the findings should not be used by men as an excuse not to help out at home.

“Men who refuse to help around the house could increase conflict in their marriage and lower their wives’ marital satisfaction,” said lead author Sabino Kornrich, a former UW graduate student who is now a researcher at the Juan March Institute in Madrid.

Although the data used in the study was collected from 1992 to 1994, which is the most recent survey looking into sexual frequency among married couples, Brines said it is unlikely that sex in the marital home has changed much since then.

“Marriage today isn’t what it was 30 or 40 years ago, but there are some things that remain important,” she said. “Sex and housework are still key aspects of sharing a life, and both are related to marital satisfaction and how spouses express their gender identity.”

COMMENTS [ 35 ]

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Oh what trite nonsense. To put it politely. Men are just as capable of doing the washing and changing nappies. This gender distinction thing when it comes to domestic sharing is so 1950.

Jan 31, 2013 9:8 | 0 replies

I.n.c.o.g.n.i.t.o
LeparaThePresident
I.n.c.o.g.n.i.t.o
My libido for my ex dropped dead after he couldn't be man enough to be father to his child
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Eish try bathing with cold water dear.
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No worries...I'm not missing much
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I see.

Jan 31, 2013 11:45 | 0 replies

@Nkayi

It's men such as your brother in law that put me off!! She waits on him hand and foot and he still expects to be "serviced" in the bedroom?? Uyahlanya!!

Jan 31, 2013 11:48 | 0 replies

@ Nkayi- This man is not doing anything not because he can not do it but he needs to find a basis to complain about something else than the fact that he has no job. I too could not handle this situation as i had no energy and was totally worn out from being a woman, mother, man, accountant and his mother!
I left after our home became a battle field since i had no energy for bedroom. Bottom line is, a man will not put his woman into such a situation but a boy in a man's body will.

Jan 31, 2013 11:50 | 0 replies

Nkayi
This so true, coz as im writing my siter had a fight with her husband, how could he expect her to do the bedroom duty whilst shes deadly tired. she works and he does not. they have a 1yr baby boy he cant look after the baby, so shes paying for the Creche. but the problem is: shes waking up as early as 4:am prepare food for the baby taking the baby to creche coz hes saying he cant hes sleepy. from work she star from scratch, collecting the baby from creche bathing the baby and washing the cloth and preparing the babes food and cooking dinner+washing dishes. he fell asleep before she sleeps bcoz she will still be busy with house chores, when she gets to bed she will be extremely tired them HE STARTS DEMANDING HER TO PERFOM BEDROOM DUTIES! Then a war begins when she REFUSES . But is she wrong by REFUSING WITH HER FORBIDEN FRUIT YINI HLABEZULU,,,,,,,,,? PLIZ HELP

ISIT YOUR SISTER OR YOU??? I support her on this one after all she is human

Jan 31, 2013 11:52 | 0 replies

Now to comment on the topic- a woman does not need to make a man do anything and i personally feel that things that are done willingly are done with love rather than those that are drilled into. I have a nanny that does all the cleaning/washing and minding of the kids. I do all the cooking and hubby does home work. A man will gladly be hands on what he can do and needs no reminding or cajoling

Jan 31, 2013 12:0 | 0 replies

Hai...man (pun unintendent), I hope my man wont see this as I have him by his b@lls when it comes to cleaning the house. He does it so well that when its time to do act he just sleeps, ja he understands me when I say I am tired.

Jan 31, 2013 12:27 | 0 replies

@ISIDINDI
Meaning you starve everytime he cleans the house?? and he starve when you clean the house? tjooo phela cleaning is an everyday thing . i hope u not suggetsing that there is hunger somewhere there

Jan 31, 2013 12:39 | 0 replies

@Chichi7
Now to comment on the topic- a woman does not need to make a man do anything and i personally feel that things that are done willingly are done with love rather than those that are drilled into. I have a nanny that does all the cleaning/washing and minding of the kids. I do all the cooking and hubby does home work. A man will gladly be hands on what he can do and needs no reminding or cajoling
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That's true, I am willing to help out when the situation demands it and don't need a nag always telling me what or what not to do!

Jan 31, 2013 12:49 | 0 replies

@ISIDINDI
Hai...man (pun unintendent), I hope my man wont see this as I have him by his b@lls when it comes to cleaning the house. He does it so well that when its time to do act he just sleeps, ja he understands me when I say I am tired.
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No wonder because his b@lls are too small!

Jan 31, 2013 12:50 | 0 replies

K@K I help out when I am off or ka di weekend at times I work 7 days stryt plus stand by and she stays at home but when I am off I tel her to rest and I will do all the cleaning and stuff mara stil she wil be "tired"...women dnt know what they want, too much sex they complain less sex they complain This research ke masepa fela

Jan 31, 2013 1:4 | 0 replies