"There was a time when many women cherished their bodies, much like a sacred temple. Where only a noble man, one who respected and loved her, had access to her body. But over time it seems women have failed to realise the important role their sexuality plays in finding a long-term mate," he moans.

He says that in his days a man had to put in a little romance and dedication, but now women throw themselves at men for sex in exchange for a ride to work or lunch.

So why is it so easy for women to engage in sexual activities these days?

According to Dr Thobani Maweni, a psychologist, young girls are made to believe that being "sexy" equates to empowerment, and that only through promiscuity and sexual aggression will they achieve their friends' admiration.

"There are more images in the media now and, especially because of the media, women are getting more insecure.

"What is worrisome is that most of them are not sexually liberated. They do not have sex because they enjoy it, but they are desperate for male approval that they'll do anything to get it."

Maweni says, for example, that young girls who are trying to find their identity see Khanyi Mbau's nude pictures, Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian's sex tapes and want to emulate them.

"The media portrays girls as sex symbols and all these young girls think that if they act sexy and dress like Chomee they will fit in and boys will like it and want to date them."

He says sexual freedom is more acceptable than it used to be and the media perpetuates the stereotype that girls are made worthy via their sex appeal.

He blames the absence of fathers in young girls' lives as the main cause of their insecurity. He says women who are coming from a place of need have a tendency to jump the gun when it comes to dating.

"The end result is a missed opportunity for a possible long-term relationship and, almost as bad, a loss of dignity."

But Zuko Mathyila, a male activist in Cape Town, disagrees. He says women aren't more insecure than before.

"Quite the contrary, "He says they now have so much confidence in their endeavours to equal men that they are willing to act like men even in their promiscuous habits. The lowering of standards is just one more of the feminists' great achievements."

He says because women are told to be strong and independent, they have to act like men - party hard, get drunk and have lots and lots of sex. So they go out and think they are "using" men for their own gratification and that they are powerful and independent for doing so.

"I blame the corruption of morality, the destruction of the family and the general promiscuity squarely on feminism, which preaches how 'empowering' this behaviour is."

He says men like a bit of a challenge, and if they end up in bed with a woman after the first date, they are unlikely to feel much respect for a woman.

"The more people use the object, the more it depreciates and the less bargaining power it has: this is a plain psychological fact of life. Most women don't realise the seriousness with which men view a woman's promiscuity.

"Women think that because men don't care about how many women they've slept with, they won't care about how many men their woman has slept with.

"But the reality is that most men do place great value on a woman's sexual restraint."

Comments

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Tue May 21 20:27:12 SAST 2013 ::

Nov 22, 2011

njini

"The lowering of standards is just one more of the feminists' great achievements." there is an element of truth in this statement!!

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Nov 22, 2011

RobinH

Zuko Mathyila, a male activist in Cape Town: who the h*ll are you and where do you come up with this disgusting stereotype of men when you say, of women (but indirectly stereotyping men): "they have to act like men - party hard, get drunk and have lots and lots of sex." HEY KIDDO, for a "male activist (Active in what cause, one wonders, as you clearly have little grasp of masculinity) you have seriously skewed ideas about what makes a man. Sis man, are you suggesting that partying hard, being constantly inebriated (best look that long word up, you ignorant person), and permanently running about screwing are what defines manhood? Think again. Many men actually find that sort of behaviour indulgent, adolescent and thus not particularly desirable. I object strenuously. There are many perfectly normally sexed men with no penile obsessions or macho-complexes, who actually just have the odd drink, party on occasion but not obsessively as this jerk suggests, and enjoy sufficient sex with one partner at a time. And I assure you, dear Zuko, our clueless "activist", that I am as much a man as you are, if not more so. So please, put down your activist nametag, as you just have no idea, and keep your truly inane notions under wraps.
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Nov 22, 2011

hiddengold

I agree with the part that most of the women act this way because there are no male figures in their lives. We cannot accept that there are too many young men and women growing up without their fathers. Men need to take responsibility for the parenting of their children.
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Nov 22, 2011

sechaba30

Thats why South Africa has the highest number of people living with HIV in the whole Universe.
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Nov 22, 2011

pik_it_up

im undecided or maybe the two opposing views are correct.

there will be the group of women who find the need to please men with the only thing that they know will work...sex

and there will be the group who just simply enjoy having sex because they dont see themselves as victims or falling as preys to sexually hungry men

either way its natural for us women to enjoy sex but we usually arent as open and frisky as men....it goes according to your beliefs i suppose
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Nov 22, 2011

DjEp

Maweni and Mathyila, the bible says "everything has its own time.." apartheid was here it was time, democracy and corruption is here, its time. Aids was here, it was time. Sex, sex and more sex is here its time. everything you see will have its peak in this life. Taxi drivers used to bull people it was time, etc etc, etc. let people enjoy sex while it last, there will be time people wont be so interested in it so much. stop explaining follow the Bible teachings..
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Nov 22, 2011

Socrates

Zuko you make sound like women want to be men and if that is the case then the society has serious problems. Men and women differ and the sooner we accept the better. Actually our generation is regressing into oblivion, when our forefathers understood this phenomenon, we are failing. men must remain men and women women
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Nov 22, 2011

DJWinner

SA women are good, they are sharing their punannies. Why should we be complaining really? Life is too short, ladies and gentlemen. We must fcuk while we still can. We must not forget using condoms though.....

I haven't seen Chomee in a while, I like the way she and her dancers shake their esses.....


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Nov 22, 2011

tpaz

Sex is good.
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Nov 22, 2011

candilious

@RobinH-Morning he surely pissed on your battery early.Point well made.


Although i have to agree with him media plays a major part in how girls/Ladies presents themselves these days.
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