CONFESSION BOX: Life has been very cruel to me

I have had a difficult upbringing. I never knew my father and my mother had relationships with many men, some of whom abused me when I was very young.

I left home to live with a man who I fell in love with. He let me stay with him for a while and then sent me back home.

I do everything I possibly can for him and always put his needs before mine. He doesn't see it though. He says I am selfish.

He never keeps his promises and I see little of him. I feel as if I no longer want to keep on struggling, and it will teach him a lesson if I take my life.

Please help me.

Desperate, Umlazi

Believe me, you will not teach him any lessons by taking your life.

If you did this you would hurt the people who really love you, your family and friends. Sometimes we fall in love with people who are neither capable nor willing to give us the love we deserve.

This is not a reflection on the sort of person you are but it is rather a reflection on what a selfish and unworthy person he is.

Ultimately, he is not giving you what you need in a relationship - so you should seriously consider ending it. All you are getting is unhappiness, and I think you have been through enough hard time. Take control of your life and in time you will meet someone who will be able to give you real love.