My husband and I have been married for five years and we are in our early 30s. We are two very different people but it has worked for us until recently.
I am a very social person with a wide circle of friends. He is very shy, quiet and loves to be at home. I used to be very overweight, but last year I decided to diet and start walking. This has resulted in me losing a lot of weight.
I feel wonderful. I had to buy new clothes and changed the way I look completely. To cut a long story short, my husband now suspects I am having an affair.
As much as I try to reassure him that I love him and would never cheat on him, the more suspicious he gets.
I have told him that I will not give up my friends and he is always welcome to join us when I do see them. He goes through my phone and my computer (he thinks I don't know) and checks my every move.
It is fine when I am at home but if I go out then we do nothing but fight. He says it is not because of the way I look but just a feeling that he has [that I'm cheating on him].
He is becoming more depressed and anxious, and I don't know how to help him.
Well done on your achievement. I am sure that your husband finds you more attractive and is probably worried that other men do too. This cannot be the only reason for his anxiety and depression though.
Anxiety can be crippling and cause a person to behave in abnormal ways. In his case, it has taken over his life and he is crossing all sorts of boundaries. This is not something he will be able to sort out himself and he will need your love and support to overcome his problems.
You need to be tough and explain to him that he has to get professional help. He needs to see a doctor. I would suggest you contact the SA Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG) for advice and support for him.
SADAG can be contacted on 011-234-4837 or 0800-12-13-14.
CONFESSION BOX: Hubby thinks I'm cheating
My husband and I have been married for five years and we are in our early 30s. We are two very different people but it has worked for us until recently.
I am a very social person with a wide circle of friends. He is very shy, quiet and loves to be at home. I used to be very overweight, but last year I decided to diet and start walking. This has resulted in me losing a lot of weight.
I feel wonderful. I had to buy new clothes and changed the way I look completely. To cut a long story short, my husband now suspects I am having an affair.
As much as I try to reassure him that I love him and would never cheat on him, the more suspicious he gets.
I have told him that I will not give up my friends and he is always welcome to join us when I do see them. He goes through my phone and my computer (he thinks I don't know) and checks my every move.
It is fine when I am at home but if I go out then we do nothing but fight. He says it is not because of the way I look but just a feeling that he has [that I'm cheating on him].
He is becoming more depressed and anxious, and I don't know how to help him.
Well done on your achievement. I am sure that your husband finds you more attractive and is probably worried that other men do too. This cannot be the only reason for his anxiety and depression though.
Anxiety can be crippling and cause a person to behave in abnormal ways. In his case, it has taken over his life and he is crossing all sorts of boundaries. This is not something he will be able to sort out himself and he will need your love and support to overcome his problems.
You need to be tough and explain to him that he has to get professional help. He needs to see a doctor. I would suggest you contact the SA Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG) for advice and support for him.
SADAG can be contacted on 011-234-4837 or 0800-12-13-14.
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