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We need to slay the dragon of shaming women


Curating our lives has always been a part of the human experience. From as far back as the cavemen who inscribed their experience on rocks, to the now dusty and highly treasured family album that houses different memories.

Even the performative art of socialising has lent itself to a form of curation as we neaten up our experiences in the public eye, pretending to be the perfect couple, wife, or whichever role we are filling.

With the advent of social media the curation experience has grown even bigger, and with it pressure to be perfect.

Enter (among other social media-borne phenomenons) the phenom that is slay queens - perfectly manufactured social media personalities that have cast a new eye to the high-flying life of young girls who seem to have it all: good looks, perfect booties and access to some of the finest things on offer. But this week I watched as a Twitter thread tore into the lives of slay queens.

If you missed the furore, the seemingly fancy lives of these young girls has been suggested to be a form of prostitution.

Cue the receipts which included screen grabs of men soliciting sex, negotiations on what sex was to be had, and the number of nights this sex was to be offered for and whether or not friends could join.

Twitter went into overdrive as posts that included slay queens' names and social media handles got retweeted, shared on WhatsApp other platforms.

The women involved were publicly shamed for their wayward ways. But what of the men? Nothing. Not a name. Not a picture. Just the fierce glare on the women who were called out for their sexual ways.

Don't in any way see this as a defence for the alleged behavior of any of the women involved.

But ask yourself how in 2018 we still live in a world that only shames women for expressing themselves sexually. Isn't it time we held each other equally responsible for engaging in the adult act of sex?

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