ANC's messy leadership narrative resembles Game of Thrones' storyline
This is the story of Thumamina and Gedleyihlekisa - half-brothers from two different mothers, but sired by their very old but highly promiscuous father Khongolose.
We start the story when Khongolose is very sick. His people, called the Mzansi family, believe the old man is about to die. Thumamina and Gedleyihlekisa are called to the side of Khongolose's bed, so they can receive his blessings.
He gives an expensive necklace to Gedleyihlekisa. "Son, guard this with your life. It was passed to me by various generations of the Mzansi family. If you do not want it, give it your brother Thumamina. Not to any stranger."
Then the old man turns to Thumamina, "For you, here's a gold and diamond bracelet given to me by my own grandmother." Then he leans forward and whispers into the boy's ear: "Careful of Gedle. He's too much into dancing; not serious about the riches of this family."
Khongolose gives his two sons money to buy him some medicine for his ailment. He tells them to go to two different suppliers.
The one who comes back home first, shall be rewarded. Excited, the two boys leave the house at a clip.
On the way to the medicine man, Gedle sees his agemates at a street corner, gambling. He watches for a while and decides, "Ag, let me put my father's money here, and multiply it."
He loses the money immediately. A chap who's been watching him lose calls him aside. "I can give you more money so you can go and buy whatever your parents sent you to buy. But you'll have to give me that necklace you're wearing." The man pauses, then adds: "By the way, I'm Shabby Sheyiki. These are my brothers Mo and Chips."
Gedle reluctantly accepts the money and relinquishes the necklace. Then he rushes to the medicine man.
Meanwhile, in his rush to his own medicine man, Thumamina stumbles into a fight, at a settlement called Malikana. Without thinking, he throws in his support with one side which proceeds to kill 40 people.
He buys the medicine, then rushes back home. However, by that time, word has reached old man Khongolose that Thumamina helped kill innocent people in Malikana. Khongolose, and the whole Mzansi family, are livid.
Khongolose is also angry with Gedle for having lost his necklace. "Go and find it, otherwise don't ever come back." Gedle goes back. Along the way, he finds a party in progress. He joins in, starts dancing. When the sun has disappeared behind the horizon, he remembers he was on a mission.
A fast thinker and observant chap, he sidles up to a group of well-dressed men. He feels they can help him reclaim the family jewels from the Sheyikis. The well-dressed men call themselves the Gubutas, from a far-away land.
The Gubutas accompany Gedle to the house of the Sheyikis, and duly reclaim the valuable necklace.
"Let's keep this for you," says the Gubutas. "But here's some money so you can silence your old man."
It is such a lot of money that some members of the Mzansi family immediately forget Gedle's sins. Many cut themselves generous slices from this cake from the Gubutas. Then they ask for more. Noteworthy beneficiaries of the Gubutas' loot are Gedle's snotty-nosed distant cousins Zwayimanyi, Andimgubutama and Cloudy.
Thumamina, now in charge of Khongolose's affairs, immediately tells all his relatives who accepted money from the Gubutas to hand it back. Aided and abetted by Gedle the dancer, Zwayimanyi, Andimgubutama and Cloudy dig in their heels.
We stop this instalment of the Game of Thrones-like narrative wondering aloud how Thumamina is going to deal with his three distant cousins as they hit the streets with their newly formed gangs: the ATM, the ACM and BLF.
Until next week.