Victims need to see rapists get punished
I sometimes resent the rondavel I called home back in Willowvale in the Eastern Cape. It exposed me to a painful experience that my mother went through.
On one breezy evening, coming from collecting "inyanda", my mother approached home like a volcano. Inyanda is a bundle of sticks collected in the field which helps to make a fire for cooking.
She pushed the door while shouting: "They raped me." Sleeping on the floor, my mattress felt smaller as I stared at my older sister. Her eyes were wide open when she jumped from the bed - the only bed we had at home which she shared with my mother.
I was 16 years old and I knew what rape was.
I closed my eyes forcefully because I was too embarrassed to look at my 56-year-old mother. I was embarrassed because she was naked. She had been raped by six young men, that is what she told us.
As she spoke, her face turned pink and the greenish veins in her hands were even more visible. She was shaking and mumbling as she detailed the events to us.
While looking at her, I saw a facial expression that replaced her ever-smiling face, that experience is forever etched in my mind .
My mother's dignity was gone.
She went to the hospital and it was confirmed that HIV had been transmitted to her, so since then she has been living with the virus.
We had travelled 40km to the nearest police station to report the case. Evidence was provided, but no arrest was ever made because my mother couldn't identify any of the criminals. That was the excuse we got from those lazy policemen.
But 10 years later, my mother is still beautiful, strong and healthy. Maybe her rapists are living their lives to the fullest too. I don't know.
As a result I can't trust men, not because they have been bad to me, but because they were once bad to my mother.
That is why I was happy when I heard that the murder and attempted murder case against an Eastern Cape woman, arrested after she killed one man and wounded two others who she found raping her daughter, was struck off the roll.
I was also relieved when Brickz, the kwaito star, was sentenced to 15 years' imprisonment for raping his 17-year-old relative.
You know why?
Mainly because I feel like the safety and protection of women and young girls - especially in rural areas - have never been a priority.
Let's make it a priority to show victims of rape that their cry is heard and appropriate steps will be taken to punish the perpetrators.
In rural areas, women are constantly raped and when they report it, the entire village gets to know due to police who don't know the meaning of confidentiality. That's why some women never report such cases.
To eradicate rape, we need to see a partnership between the minister of women in the Presidency and South African Police Service .
We need strategies that will empower women, and at the same time, prevent sexual abuse and the killing of women and girls.
As for the law, no bail should be granted to rapists.
I strongly believe that once we address these issues, women will regain their freedom of movement and dignity.
* The author got her mother's permission to disclose her HIV status.