Unveiled jerseys hypnotising, classy
The most interesting thing about a new season in the Premier Soccer League, besides the boys' thighs, is when new kits are unveiled.
All the big three PSL giants, Kaizer Chiefs, Orlando Pirates and Mamelodi Sundowns, have done their new team jerseys reveal, but some left me with more questions than answers.
Did Kaizer Chiefs, for instance, hire a hypnotherapist to design their home jersey?
The man in charge at the club has a plan. They're just going to hypnotise their opponents into giving them the ball.
Their spiral-shaped stripes react like an optical illusion when stared at too long. We've seen many interpretations of the Kaizer Chiefs shirts over the years and who can forget the one that earned them the moniker "the Zebras"?
Listen to the latest episode of the SportsLIVE PODCAST
This season it seems the team has thrown caution to the wind, abandoned their minimalist approach and embraced maximalist at its fullest.
Wena Kaizer Motaung, your psychological games to win matches won't work, retire the Fibonacci spiral please, it puts us in danger.
Imagine being approached by a man in that jersey and the inevitable white pants? The headache!
Speaking of being approached by men, a jersey worth stealing from your man is the new Orlando Pirates one.
It's simple, classy and a throwback. Fashion is cyclic after all, and finding out they went for the design the 1995 team wore when they won the CAF Champions League makes it even more noticeable.
Granted, some Kaizer Chiefs fans might find it boring (cough, cough) but the clean lines are a relief to the eye. As a clothing item, you can never go wrong with monochrome.
Goes well with jeans, track pants as well as a dress worn with chunky sneakers. We'll definitely be seeing lots of this jersey on our Instagram feed.
It's the same old design when it comes to Mamelodi Sundowns.
In the past, the team's designs have played with shorter sleeves or a tighter fit but the jersey has largely remained untouched. Their jerseys never have the personality that the other teams do.