THERE won't be cheers of Merry Christmas in the Mahlwele family home this year.

The wait for the return of the remains of their mother, Kgomotso, presumed to have died in the Synagogue Church of All Nations collapse in Lagos, Nigeria, in September, continues.

Mahlwele, a Mpumalanga department of education circuit manager in Middelburg , is one of 11 people whose remains were not returned to South Africa last month.

The family has cancelled a planned trip to the coast in case there is news about the return of their mom's remains.

"It's going to be a sad Christmas without my mom," said Kgomotso's youngest son Mpho.

Mahlwele had two sons and a daughter. "We don't want to be far, in case there's an announcement that their bodies are returning home," Mpho said.

On September 12, 116 people, among them 85 South Africans, were killed when a guest house attached to the Synagogue Church of all Nations (Scoan) collapsed.

Only 74 of the 85 bodies were brought back to South Africa on November 16 - 66 days after the collapse. The bodies were identified through DNA evidence.

Although DNA samples were taken from families, the Mahlwele family said they were in the dark as the government had not updated them on progress regarding the repatriation.

Mpho said holidays would never be the same without their mother.

"During the festive season, we are normally all at our home in Middelburg.

"We would go to church in the morning and my mom would prepare a meal for us. But this year it won't be the same."

He said despite the absence of proof that their mother had died, the family had accepted that she was no more.

But this is not so for his four-year-old son Olwethu, who keeps asking when he would "fetch his grandmother from Jesus".

"I would get emotional, but I know I have to be strong for my family through these trying times," said Mpho.

The family's agony is made all the worse by the fact that they cannot wind up Mahlwele's financial affairs because they cannot obtain a death certificate without definite proof that she has died.

Mahlwele's salary, debit orders and life covers are still being paid.

"The absence of her body makes it difficult to obtain a death certificate, so we can't claim anything. We don't have access to stop the debit orders."

The Mahlweles are not alone in their agonising wait.

Joe Jordan, a former Eastern Cape ANC MPL, is still waiting for news of his son Sidima, who is also presumed to have died in the tragedy.

"This is our third month weeping," said Jordan.

This was Sidima's first visit to Scoan, and unfortunately, it seems he will not be returning to his eight-year-old son Xhantilomzi.

"There's this gap that cannot be bridged, not until we have our son back," said Jordan, explaining that it was impossible to find closure without burying his son's remains.

On the day Sidima left, father and son discussed the scriptures.

He recalled that Sidima was in high spirits and his parting shot was that the trip was going to be a blessing. But now it has turned into a nightmare.

"I had planned to throw a feast this month, to thank God that all my children are still alive. But now..."

ntsambab@sowetan.co.za

Families asked to be

GOVERNMENT spokeswoman Phumla Williams says authorities are waiting for feedback from Nigerian authorities.

"Work is currently being done in the laboratories, and our embassy in Nigeria is working hard to make sure we get feedback as soon as possible," she said.

Williams asked families to be patient. "We ask families to bear with us during this time. We are doing everything in our power to ensure their loved ones come back home. We will update families as soon as we have feedback," she said.

Meanwhile, Pastor T B Joshua failed again on Monday to appear at a coroner's inquest into the building collapse at his Lagos church.

He was summonsed twice to give evidence at the inquest. Joshua claimed the collapse may have been a sabotage. His lawyers are attempting to stop the inquest. - Busisiwe Ntsamba