I have been married for nine years and we have an eight-year-old son. I love my husband, but every time we fight he tells me his other children come first and that I hate them. I only hear this when we fight.

I have been married for nine years and we have an eight-year-old son. I love my husband, but every time we fight he tells me his other children come first and that I hate them. I only hear this when we fight.

He has four children with four different mothers. I fell in love with him when I was 19 and now I am 36.

It bothers me that he has regular contact with the mothers of his children. He gossips about me with his kids and when I walk in they keep quiet.

One of his children lives with us. I told him to take the child to his mother and he said he will decide who leaves his house.

I am thinking of divorcing him.

Can you please advise me? Am I making the right decision.

He keeps telling me that I don't love his children and that is why they don't come to our home.

Anonymous, Johannesburg

Sister, grow up and stop being small-minded and unpleasant. It is admirable that this man puts his children first, unlike so many other men who father children and then disappear.

What kind of person are you that you begrudge innocent children getting love and support from their father? What kind of person are you that you make his children feel unwelcome in your home? How insecure and jealous are you to begrudge a father loving his children. Shame on you.

You say he is in contact with his ex-girlfriends. So what? I presume he is in contact about his children and related matters. You don't say he is having an affair.

Grow up and stop being petty. And if you can't, then, yes, divorce him. That way he and his kids can have the loving and fun home they want, without you putting nasty spokes in the works.