I am a responsible woman with a good job. I have a wonderful boyfriend and we have been together for a year. The problem is that he smokes dagga.

I am a responsible woman with a good job. I have a wonderful boyfriend and we have been together for a year. The problem is that he smokes dagga.

I am not comfortable with his use of drugs. I have told him my feelings and asked him to stop.

He says he will never stop because he has smoked it for many years and in his line of work it is normal.

I feel very confused because I don't want to leave him but I don't know how to come to terms with his smoking. How can I sort this out?

When you started going out with him you presumably knew that he smoked dagga and might have thought at some stage that you would be able to get him to stop. By now you might realise that this is easier said than done.

He is dependent on dagga to function from day to day. You cannot force him to stop and he will only give up if he really wants to.

If you try to make him choose between you and the drug, he will probably choose the drug.

If he decides to stop he will probably need professional help. You must think carefully whether his behaviour would be acceptable among your family, friends and colleagues. Would you want to build your future and possibly have a family with him under the present circumstances? This is a decision you must make.