Load shedding ignites creative naming frenzy

Life has been a giggle a minute since the load shedding by Eskom began. There is a joke about how blackouts have been spin-doctored into load shedding once they jumped the highway from townships to white suburbs.

Life has been a giggle a minute since the load shedding by Eskom began. There is a joke about how blackouts have been spin-doctored into load shedding once they jumped the highway from townships to white suburbs.

It is not that power failures are funny but that we do not have any choice in the matter. Moaning forever will not ignite the grid or whatever makes electricity.

The other day we had a rude foreigner in the taxi who told the taxi driver where to get off. The poor man was having trouble with our money and thought he had been cheated.

He kept on saying "no one cheat Anastasio". As soon as he got off, we started laughing at his funny name.

Someone said foreigners were influencing our lifestyle without our realising it and that we would soon have children with funny names.

Our Model C Pinky said names change according to upheavals in society. She said when the white man came to Africa, blacks changed their names to Simon and Lukas and Zacharia.

Soccer players were called Terror, Master, Professor and Doctor.

When Steve Biko had our minds in thrall, we named our children Palesa, Ayanda and Unathi. We were quick to show our political colours and how "aware" we were by rejecting names such as Chrisostom, Geraldine, Anastacia and Grace.

Pinky said disgruntled Eskom customers are now going to mimic the Zimbabweans and name their children by what Eskom was up to when the babies were born.

There was a prominent Zimbabwean called Mr Chemical Plant no 19 as he was born right outside that factory.

Pinky added that in future we should not be surprised if one of our leaders is called Mr Powers Lekota. His full name would actually be Mr Power Failure Lekota.

Mr Load Nzimande would be Mr Load Shedding Nzimande. Nzimande could also "tune" his name to Shedd.

Sis Blackie would be the nickname of Miss Blackout Sisulu. Our poet laureate's name would be Mr Rollout Mbuli.

Auntie Emma said she knew a client of her company's whose first name was Simcard. This gentleman was from the Msinga district in the Midlands of KwaZulu-Natal.

She said we should not laugh at other people as we also have the habit of naming our children Mapule-Nomvula for the endless rains we are having at present.

The taxi driver joined in and said he had, on many occasions, met women called Matlakala in North West. He said the name put him off and, to his knowledge, none of the Matlakalas had ever snagged a husband.

A young chap sniggered and said it would be difficult to be affectionate to a Matlakala, lovey (Garbage, lovey). He said he had been to school with girls named Kgathatso, Kelisaletse, Nontsokolo and Nozimanga. He said they all grew up to be troubled souls.

I hope our future leaders will not fail to roll out development because of their unfortunate names.

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