Fakes on the take

11 December 2006 - 02:00
By unknown

H I thought all the drama from the Metros was over until the whole fight between Somizi Mhlongo and Chomee, or rather Arthur Mafokate on Metro FM, the whole week . drama, drama drama. I mean the poor thing had to return the award when all she needed to do was change her costume. So she gave up an award instead of the "copied" costumes. I did say that one day this cut-and-paste yika Arthur will get himself into trouble.

H I thought all the drama from the Metros was over until the whole fight between Somizi Mhlongo and Chomee, or rather Arthur Mafokate on Metro FM, the whole week . drama, drama drama. I mean the poor thing had to return the award when all she needed to do was change her costume. So she gave up an award instead of the "copied" costumes. I did say that one day this cut-and-paste yika Arthur will get himself into trouble.

H Still on Arthur. What the heck was he wearing at the Metros? Huh? And just when I thought that I was traumatised enough, there was 3sum in their red plastic leather outfits. I could understand if it is the costumes for their acts or outfits for the Metros. Haai mara, these gays. I thought I was seeing Michael Jackson for a second when Amstel rocked up. Ooh, before I forget, somebody please stop Jeff from drinking.

H TS Records might not have won anything but they are very angry - bakwatile. Their artist came in a Hummer last week to the Kwaito Festival at Wemmer Pan. How dramatic is that? This is exactly why their artists become big-headed. You see.

H Khanyi Mbau never ceases to amaze me. She arrived with her sugar daddy at the Metros and her invite said she was staying at the Holiday Inn. To her surprise she was not booked there. She then threw a tantrum and ordered to be booked into an en-suite fitted with Egyptian linen. Now that's the definition of a celebrity. By the way, she is due any day now.

H How do you, as a father of a child, deny your own daughter? Mandla Mthembu must probably be feeling like a pimple.

I can only imagine how this child will look at her father, knowing she was denied. Mandla, I think you qualify as the Moegoe of the year. May the dear Lord forgive all your sins.

H Mzwandile of the television show Choice must think he's the hottest thing since boiling water. Apparently he has dumped his girlfriend, a marketing something at SABC3, for an SABC Zulu News reader. I thought this boy was gay, the way I always see him in the mix with 3sum and Iko Mash, dancing as if he was on jika ma jika. Ooh Iko, when can we expect the album, Sisi?

H I bumped into Wright Ngubeni at a police station. It seems this boy's case is very heavy.

Yo, good luck.

H Now on to serious stuff. The launch of new author Zukiswa Wanner's novel The Madams at Xarra Books in Newtown on Thursday turned out to be the sweetest thing for Joburg's up-and coming intellectuals.

The book is supposed to be a work of fiction by this young and promising novelist.

However, the Xarra audience, mostly young as they are, picked up on one part of the whole book and made it the centre of discussion - the gender issue.

They went on about how men continue to cheat and pass on diseases.

Granted, but what was not pointed out is the fact that some women allow themselves to lose the potential power they wield by being materialistic. They will do almost anything for money, including go out with a rich but filthy man, just to be seen by all and sundry in that German sedan.

Co-owner of Xarra Books, the likeable June Josephs-Langa, thinks the audience is clever and the discussions are hot, but only if they did not lose the plot.

June, you have a point.

By the way, Xarra Books has a sale going on.

Maybe it is time our mostly fake celebrities added sophistication to their otherwise plastic lives by buying their loved ones a book as a Christmas present.