How to introduce sex toys to your relationship

Tired of the same sexual positions? Here are some tips on how to gently introduce some spice to your love life.

Sex toys are mainly associated with porn and or single women who seek self gratification; however the actual truth is, many people use naughty gadgets, and there are plenty of these to enhance their sexual experiences.

Sex toys can range from objects that tickle and vibrate, to various products that can be inserted.

The most important factor when introducing something new to your relationship is communication. Try not to make it sound like you are bored with the current situation as this might be seen as a personal blow to your partner (not the blow you're thinking about).

  • Explain that the toys would only be there to enhance the experience and make it more enjoyable for the two of you.
  • Suggest that you visit a sex shop together just to look around and decide if its something you both want.
  • Give your partner time to ease into the idea.
  • Start with small things like lubricants, flavoured condoms and massage oils. You can also try edible underwear and body chocolate that you can lick off each other.

Some toys you can use as an introduction to your new sexual adventures:

  • Vibrating pleasure rings

Let's start off by helping the guys out first, then move on to pleasing the women.The pleasure ring will leave you with sensations you have never felt before.

  • Clitoral vibrators

For the women. If you find it difficult to orgasm from penetration, clitoral vibrator will be your best friend. Have multiple orgasms with this before, during and/or after penetration.


Handcuffs / scarves / tie

Tie him up, tie her up. As long as someone is tied up, it's gonna get exciting. Handcuffs can be placed around the wrists behind you or your partner’s back while in a chair as a restraint mechanism. Be sure to agree on a code word or signal with your partner that will allow them to release the handcuffs.


Mini-massager instead of the more intimidation dildo

The head is the genius part here, and never fails with clitoral stimulation.

Vibrating bullet / egg


The Silver Bullet is a tiny, egg-shaped vibrator that is powerful and discreet. You can keep on you at all times. A great date-teaser. Push it up, give him the remote and go out on a date together.

What’s the best way to use sex toys?

No matter what sex toy you choose to use or how you choose to use it, there are a few things to keep in mind to make the experience pleasurable and help protect yourself from STIs.

Before using the toy check, for any imperfections, including rough seams, tears, or cracks.

Using lubrication is a great way to help enhance the pleasure and safety of sex toys. Ask your salesperson which lube is best for the toy or follow the instructions that come with the toy.

Brown University writes, silicone lubes break down silicone toys after a while.

  • Flavored lubes may cause yeast infections for some females because the sugar can disrupt the balance of pH in the vagina.
  • Oil-based lubes will break down latex condoms and dental dams, which will increase your risk for contracting STIs.
  • If sharing sex toys, such as dildos, butt plugs, or vibrators, use condoms and dental dams to help prevent the spread of STIs.
  • If switching the toy to another person, make sure to use a different condom or dental dam. Remember, soap alone is not effective for removing STI bacteria or viruses from the toy.
  • Don’t insert a sex toy in the mouth or vagina if it has been used in the anus without a condom or without being washed properly. This could spread bacteria and viruses and cause infections in the urinary tract (for females) or intestines.
  • If a condom was used with the sex toy, replace the condom with a new one before inserting the toy in the mouth or vagina.
  • If it hurts, stop! If you are using toys with a sexual partner, earn trust with one another. If you want to try again, relax and add extra lube if needed.

Now that you have some tips, it is up to you and your partner to decide what works for you.