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CONFESSION BOX: Bad affair has led to friend's misery

A few years ago my best friend started a relationship with an extremely difficult man.

A few years ago my best friend started a relationship with an extremely difficult man.

They fought a lot, bordering on him being physically and emotionally abusive.

She then fell pregnant by him and after much discussion decided to have an abortion. She regrets her decision to this day and feels enormous guilt. Since then this man has been in and out of her life and she has never been able to move on.

She leads a miserable life. I don't know what control he has over her but I think his behaviour is so unfair. She is a shell of her former self and suffers from depression.

I have run out of patience and I want to tell him what I think of him.

I am worried though that I might lose my friend.

Worried, Centurion.

If you contact this man to tell him what you think, it will only turn into a fight and he will probably tell your friend what happened.

She will feel so betrayed and it might affect your friendship. We are all responsible for the choices we make in life - it is her choice to have this man in her life.

I would urge you to encourage her to seek counselling for the trauma from having the abortion.

All you can do is to support her and help her to forgive herself and move forward. She is lucky to have such a good friend.

 

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