I FRANKLY don't know how to start trashing Alvin and the Chipmunks: Squeakquel because it's not for kids of my size and age. Ag, but I will lambast it anyway - I have a licence to do so.
So here goes. This movie is for kids - real kids. The ones who think waving your hand at them is hilarious.
And since this is a sequel, kids must have found the first instalment funny at the time - though I doubt very much that they will find this one appetising at all.
Kids have a higher IQ now and making them watch squeaking chipmunks will be kind of insulting their growing intelligence. You know what I mean?
But, hey, these are still kids, man, and they will find it in their hearts to forgive you, but you'll have to bribe them a little with things like new video games to make it up to them.
Guaranteed, kids aged between two and six will love Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel. Yes, they will laugh at the silliness of it. Do it with your kids, though.
Alvin and the Chipmunk: The Squeakquel is, as you can tell by now, a kind of struggling comedy in the adult department. And what's the story line, before I lose the plot? It's a benefit concert for the Chipmunks in Paris, France.
During the event Dave Seville (Jason Lee) gets badly injured and is taken to hospital.
While recovering he puts his cousin Toby (Zachary Levi) in charge of the diminutive Chipmunks for the time being. Levi and Aunt Jackie (Kathryn Joosten) enrol the boys - Alvin (Justin Long), Simon (Matthew Gray) and Theodore (Jesse McCartney) - at high school. The boys become a hit and are nominated to represent their classmates in the battle of the bands.
But one man, Ian Hawke (David Cross), their aggrieved former manager, launches the Chipmunks' competition, a girl chipmunk band called the Chipettes. One of the band members is named Brittany (Christina Applegate). Yes, aka Britney. Oops. The others are Jeanette (Anna Faris) and Eleanor (Amy Poehler).
So the battle of the (rodent) sexes on the dance and squeaking floor begins. And if you want to experience bad singing go watch Alvin and Chipmunks: The Squeakquel and hear the squeaky fast renditions of Beyonce's Single Ladies, Katy Perry's Hot N Cold and The Kinks' You Really Got Me, you are welcome, then Alvin and Chipmunks: The Squeakquel is your movie this Christmas.