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In the beginning, God lived alone in heaven. He was happy because He didn't have irritating questions or prayers to answer.
Out of sheer boredom, He created the universe, a place He hoped to fill with all sorts of creatures - slimy, great and small.
He also created angels to keep him company in heaven.
His relationship with Lucifer blossomed because, unlike the other angels, he could think for himself and didn't have to agree with everything that God said.
Lucifer was so opinionated that he became an advisor to God and eventually led Him to the greatest regret in His lifetime.
Thanks to Lucifer's lawyer, the disbelieving Friedrich Nietzsche, and His betrayal by the board of directors, God lost control of the universe.
This was followed by a series of "identity crises" that saw Him unemployed and booted out of heaven after impregnating His secretary Mary.
This was followed by a stint at a mental institution where He was counselled by none other than "dirty pictures-obsessed" Sigmund Freud, losing out on being part of His son, Jesus Harry Christ's, childhood, and doing time at a Beverly Hills prison.
TheComplete Secret Diaries of God paints a picture of a God who is gullible and has no control over the running of the universe.
The novel will not go down well with some Christians, who might find Koos Kombuis's sequel to The Secret Diary of God blasphemous.
After distancing myself from Kombuis's bashing of the "history" of creation and humankind, I shamelessly found the Diaries hilarious and out of this world.
I also admired Kombuis's chutzpah and creativity.
If The Complete Secret Diaries of God does not infuriate you, it will give you a new appreciation of the Bible.