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'To gift or not to gift' teases new lovers

By unknown | Dec 12, 2007 | COMMENTS [ 0 ]



To gift or not to gift?

Gift-giving is challenging enough, but when you've just started dating someone, it's even more vexing. How do you pick something that says, "I like you" without making too large a gesture or making the other person feel pressured? It's enough to make you want to skip the holiday season altogether.

Here's expert advice from Santa's little helpers:

Take the easy way out

When you've just started dating, you might not even know the person well enough to make a great-gift decision.

"My girlfriend and I just started dating after Christmas," recalls Carlos Perez.

"I wanted to do something for the holidays, so I gave a gift in her honour to a local charity. The card didn't have an amount on it, so there was no pressure, and I didn't have to worry about the size."

It's hard for even the most materialistic person to begrudge you for helping others during the holidays.

Show some thought

"The worst is the gift you know your date just bought out of a sense of obligation," says Tom Gray from the US. "Like a pair of socks or a box of candy. I'm not saying you have to break the bank, but show me you thought of me a little in the process."

Replace that Maxwell CD he mentioned he lost, or you can give her a big bottle of that olive oil she loves to cook with.

Manage your money

"Less is more," says Lisa Cohen, president of Dating Designers. "It doesn't matter if you give him a card if he's fond of you. What you give him won't change his mind. Just don't go overboard. Men sometimes go a little crazy buying an expensive gift to impress. Now he has to keep up that image. And she'll expect more and more."

Get creative

Put your effort into making something. There are craft places all over South Africa. Visit the local paint-your-own pottery place and make a fun ornament for his or her tree.

Put your apron on

Baking is a low-cost way to say: "Happy Holidays, I like you."

Following this advice will help you acknowledge the season and your budding relationship in a simple way that won't send the wrong signals. - Additional reporting from


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