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Abusive, but so wily

By Zenoyise Madikwa | Jun 13, 2011 | COMMENTS [ 496 ]

HE WAS a gentleman when you first met. A few months later he changed into a monster and is scaring the hell out of you

He calls 1000 times a day, obsesses over every date and gets jealous when you talk to other guys.

He is psychotic. Think about Muvhango's KK, the sick, mentally abusive and very controlling vat-en-sit of Meme.

Studies indicate that one in five women will date a man like KK during their lifetime, and the Memes of this world will go to their graves still shivering at the memory.

This behaviour is more likely to occur in men than women. About one percent of women have this disorder, while three percent of men have it.

Asiphe Ndlela, a relationship expert in Illovo, Johannesburg, says women like Meme, who are in love with a psychopath, deep down know that they're dealing with a sick man, but because their self-esteem has plunged, they have internalised the abuse that is meted out by their partners.

Ndlela says: "Women in such relationships stay in the relationship because they don't think anyone will believe their stories of abuse.

"After all, the men who are abusing them look and act quite normal in their daily public lives," Ndlela says.

She adds that it often takes 35 incidents of violence before a woman approaches the police.

She says KK's kind has severe mental and emotional issues and disregards the rights of others.

"This pattern usually comes into evidence around the age of 15 and if it is not treated, it can develop in adulthood. Children who are influenced by psychotic parents may adopt these tendencies," Ndlela says.

She says when they are dumped, these men call countless times pleading for another chance. Some even try to sabotage a woman's future relationships and worst still, they stalk her.

Ndlela says most men, instead of becoming depressed and retreat to lick their wounds, often focus their negative emotions on the partner who ended the relationship.

She says psychopathic men are usually clever manipulators.

"They play to the emotions of others. They typically have high verbal intelligence, but they lack emotional intelligence. Half the time they don't understand or appreciate the impact that their behavior has on their partners," Ndlela says.

"Research has also shown that the sociopath is usually a person with an abundance of charm and wit," Ndlela says.

"He may appear friendly and considerate, but these attributes are usually superficial.

"They are used as a way of blinding the other person to the personal agenda behind the sociopath's behaviour," Ndlela says.

COMMENTS [ 496 ]

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Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A
blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find
it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the

So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the
husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he
taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don't you put a piece of
rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy."

The blind man replies, "If you would've put a rubber at the end of YOUR
stick, we'd be riding the bus . so shut up.

Jun 13, 2011 1:30 | 0 replies

@Portable & nickiminajgalost - You guys are psychopaths and stupid!

Jun 13, 2011 1:40 | 0 replies

@Barbie-Lass... i will "chisa mpama," lol!!!

Jun 13, 2011 1:42 | 0 replies


not here hunn i will be banned to post such words


you have a mind of a fly it takes you decades to think how to wash your kuku inside nxa

Jun 13, 2011 1:43 | 0 replies


sis your nose is so big o mina ka blanket !

Jun 13, 2011 1:43 | 0 replies

Tsatsi lengwe moruti mo kerekeng a ntse a rera a re:

"Porompeta e tla lla mme Gabariele o tla go tseya badira dibe botlhe a
ba ise ko go sathane.

Ya re a ntse a rera jalo, kanthe ngwana mongwe o reketswe terompeta
kwa ga bone.

Ka nako eo o ne a e letsa mo kgaufi le kereke

Phuthego ya gana go utlwa terompeta, ya ja fase.

Moruti a re go bona go le sleg, a re o tshaba ka lefenstere. Ka
go tlhoka mahlatse, a re o a itatlha, tshipi e e tshwarisang fenstere gore e
seka ya bulega, ya haka mo lupung ya borokgo.

Moruti a screamer: "Gabariele ntlogele, gare ga badira-dibe re le
kana-kana o bo otla go tshwara nna fela!"

Ke ga lupu ya borokgo e kgaoga. Moruti a tswa ka shoto, a ba feta
botlhe mo tseleng.

Ya re atla go ikhutsa a re: " Kgante dilo tsa Beibele ke nnete, Hey,
o ne a mpatrekile Gabariele maan". Wa hlanya, never a ntshware"

Jun 13, 2011 1:43 | 0 replies


you have a mind of a fly it takes you decades to think how to wash your kuku inside nxa
Report Abuse
bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa kakakkakaka hahahahahhahahahah tjo

Jun 13, 2011 1:45 | 0 replies

Spekepeke Galfrend ladygaga nickiminajqalost portable qalost

Marete le dinywana tsa lona tsa di dunderhead man. I came here in peace and you are all over me like dintsi di bona masepa a diarrhoea.

Wena ska tlwaela hampe. o e tsebela kae nywana ya pere? Kapa o ja yona? Hout kop

Jun 13, 2011 1:47 | 0 replies

Nna ke ya borega today especially when ppl on the blog fight.
La mbora tuu.....kwaaaaaakwaaaaaaaakwaaaaaa
Today my lunch was excatly like the teachers lunch - you know waht teachers eat for lunch....☺

Jun 13, 2011 1:47 | 0 replies


o mo be e kari o karen wa big brother amplified !

Jun 13, 2011 1:47 | 0 replies


you came in peace , so leave in peace before i scratch you like a chimpanzi ..

Jun 13, 2011 1:48 | 0 replies