I WAS with my ex-girlfriend for over two-and-a-half years. Things were going great - at least that's what I thought. One day she told me she didn't want to be with me anymore.

At first I didn't believe it. I loved her so much and still can't come to terms with the break-up.

It's been a year and nine months since we broke up and I still haven't totally moved on.

I find it frustrating because I really want to be happy like I was with her.

I have been in two relationships since and they broke down because I just couldn't get my ex-girlfriend out of my head.

The last girl I was with showed me true love and was willing to fight for me, but I just couldn't see it because I was blinded by love for my ex.

I finally pushed her away because I wanted to be left alone. I get a lot of attention from other girls. I just feel like I can't trust any other girl.

How can I move away from thoughts of my ex? - Sad and lonely, Volksrust

DUDU RESPONDS:

Well, we can't always control what we think. I hope you are not in the bad habit of comparing new girlfriends to your ex. If you do, you will find fault in the new ones every time.

I think you answered your question when you said you have not come to terms with the break-up.

You need to accept the relationship did not work out. Find something positive you can learn from it .

Be open to finding happiness and get away from trying to find the same thing you had with the ex.

Focus your attention on being in the moment with new girls and find the happiness in having unique girlfriends.

You have to tell yourself it is over.