I AM 19 years old, my girlfriend is 18 and we have a nine-month-old baby..

When I heard that she was pregnant, I left school to find a job so that I could support her and the baby.

My parents were very disappointed that I made my girlfriend pregnant and dropped out of school. I could not find employment so I went back to school.

I don't think a day goes by without my father telling me about the sacrifices he and my mother made for me and how I have thrown it all back in their faces.

This has made my entire family so unhappy and I don't know what I can do to make it right.

I hardly ever see my girlfriend because she is always busy with school work and the baby. Her mother looks after the baby, but insists that my girlfriend looks after the child after school and at weekends. Her parents don't want me in their house anymore.

Not so long ago my life was on track and I was so happy. Now it is in ruins because of this baby. I hate the baby. It has been a curse in my life. I feel hopeless and angry. I often wonder if I should kill myself so that I am out of this mess. Nobody would miss me.

Please help me. - Bad mistake, Dube

DUDU'S WORDS OF ADVICE:

I understand how frustrated and lonely you must be feeling.

You are both so young to have the responsibility of a child. It is also understandable that your families are upset. Parents want the best for their children and it is not easy for them to see their children making mistakes.

Both you and your girlfriend have made the right decisions by returning to school.

The way you can show your parents that you are a good person who appreciates them is to work hard at school. Be determined to succeed and become a man who they will be proud of.

Newborn babies take up a lot of their mothers' time and I am sure that it has been difficult for your girlfriend to cope with school work and the baby.

I am sure she loves the baby very much, but that doesn't mean she does not love you. Things will eventually settle down and her parents will allow you to see each other more often.

This child is a part of you. It is totally dependent on you two for love, shelter and food and it is really important that you play a part in bringing up your child. Your love for your child might not happen immediately because you blame the baby for everything that has gone wrong in your life.

Be honest - this has all happened because you and your girlfriend did not take proper precautions. No one else is to blame. Accept what has happened and make the most of it. I am sure that this is overwhelming, but killing yourself will not solve anything. Your child needs a father and your parents love you too.

• If you need someone to talk to contact Lifeline on 011-443-355 or 011-728-1347.