Sun Feb 05 03:40:02 SAST 2012
Sun Feb 05 03:40:03 SAST 2012

Unfair family is driving me to leave or kill myself

Jul 23, 2010 | Dear Dudu | 12 comments

I AM 16 years old and in Standard 9. The problem I have is with my family. I have reached the stage where I feel the only way out for me is to commit suicide.

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I cannot concentrate at school, so my marks are dropping and my parents are furious with me.

I have to do all the work in the home and it is unfair.

I was such a successful person and I feel that my life is in pieces now. I want to leave home and find a place where I can live on my own.

I do love my family, but I feel that I can no longer live with them. What should I do? Unhappy Daughter

Dudu says:

Contemplating suicide tells me that you are extremely unhappy and distressed. Suicide is not an option.

Your family loves you as much as you love them. You might not always think so, but they would not get angry with you for bad results if they didn't care for you deeply.

Ultimately, all they want is the best for you.

Being a teenager can be a difficult and confusing period in a person's life. You are at the point where your parents are probably still seeing you as a child, whereas you are becoming an adult.

It is difficult on both sides to make this adjustment. Your teenage years are important. You are changing, learning and making choices and you need the support of your parents during this time.

Your parents might feel that they are losing control of you and they might not know how to cope with this. To help each other over the difficult patches, ensure that you keep communication open and honest between you.

Try to respect each other's opinions and choices. Don't let quarrels grow before trying to solve them.

It would be hard for you to live on your own. How would you pay for your food and upkeep? You have not specified exactly what is wrong, but if you are being abused or neglected in any way, then you should phone Childline. Their number is 08000-555-55.

If not, then when everyone is calm, sit down with your parents and discuss the problems that you are facing so that you can find solutions together.

Comments

Sun Feb 05 03:40:03 SAST 2012 ::
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Jul 23, 2010

Mwelase

Afternoon unhappy daughter first of all your abuse story does not have any substance, reason thee dont justify exactly the story, i doubt the is no responsible guardian who can just like that damp his daughter. To me really and my assumption is you've got more to tell why hiding? are u khulelwe?.
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Jul 23, 2010

Mwelase

Afternoon unhappy daughter first of all your abuse story does not have any substance, reason thee dont justify exactly the story, i doubt the is no responsible guardian who can just like that damp his daughter. To me really and my assumption is you've got more to tell why hiding? are u khulelwe?.
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Jul 23, 2010

THABZ1

I think we have reached a stage were work load of our children must be monitored. Even me after work, there are times when arrive at home i feel like doing nothing and not to say one is lazy or what if what she is telling is nothing but the truth i sympathise with her.
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Jul 23, 2010

BabyNono87

suicide is not an option. i suggest you go for councelling and speak your heart out, your parents will always love you whether you obtained lower marks or not. when times get tough just kneel down and pray because you are stronger that you think you are. remember God loves you best.
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Jul 26, 2010

nictheart

Being a failure is part of the human condition: we're all failures, ever since Eve failed the apple test (with assistance from Adam, mind you). If you can manage writing to the newspaper about your failures now, you are already well on your way to handling life.
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Jul 27, 2010

tpaz

The earlier the better. If you you don't value your life . Who will. What is so special about your life? There are many people is similar situations, and have pulled through. At least you have parents imagine some who does not have, or who does not food.
the earth is better without you....jump off a bridge


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Jul 27, 2010

ehlongo

I must say I was in the same situation I kept on asking myself do I really belong in that family?Was I adopted?Is the something wrong with me?But that didnt push me to commit suicide or ran away to live with a man somewhere instead I studied harder concentrated more on my schoolwork so that I can get a busary and move out maybe live in school or get a job so that I can afford my own place.Where you gonna go you only sixteen.Are you gonna move in with a man who will abuse and take advantage of you because you have nowhere to go?I made it now I dont have to see them unless I want to.
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Jul 28, 2010

sarahmak

I KNOW THAT YOU ARE HURT,BUT ALL I CAN SAY IS THAT YOU SHOULD ASK YOUR EDUCATOR TO SPEAK TO YOUR PARENTS ABOUT GIVING YOU MORE TIME TO FOCUS ON BOOKS AND SOMEONE WHO STAYS AT HOME SHOULD DO THE HOME CHORES FOR YOU UNTIL YOU CAN BE ABLE TO LEND A HAND MOSTLY IN WEEKEND OR HOLIDAY. BUT PLEASE BE STILL, DO NOT KILL YOURSELF AS " OPPORTUNITY OF A LIFETIME COMES ONCE IN A LIVING BEING"
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Aug 10, 2010

delicate

Jah neh..............ifamily sometimes and bona they thinkl they're grooming you to be a better wife when you grow up!....Not realising that they are breaking you at the moment,I know that it's not easy to sit you parents down and explain to them what all this is doing to you and your work at school!.....................if really nothing happens then tell them you're leaving!
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Aug 31, 2010

sefebe

There is nothing special about you nana, kill yourself and the world will be a better place.
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