Seduction is the power of persuasion. Its strategies have been employed by many people to regain the love they lost.

It's possible to reconnect with the person who once loved you using seduction. Over and over, I have quelled the myth that seduction is sex or foreplay. Seduction is pure psychology.

So then how would you use psychology to win your love back? Let us look at this scenario, for example?

One husband was cheating on his wife and had one foot out of the door of their marriage. The wife was panicking and still wanted to save her marriage. They didn't have real problems. Hubby dearest just yielded to temptation.

When a hotel in George called the wife to confirm their four-day booking she was not part of, Mrs Molapo was alarmed and hurt by the phone call that confirmed his cheating.

Her husband told her he was attending business meetings in George. Everything the hotel communicated to her, however, was pleasure for two not business for one.

Her only hope at that time was to seduce him back into her arms and fast. Responding in an emotional way to a situation like this would be futile. She was faced with a quagmire of epic proportions.

Mrs Molapo had to do away with her fears and suppress her insecurities. She had war on her hands.

To win this one, she had to conceal her fears. One of the seduction strategies she used was coquetry.

Coquetry is when you play hard to get and delay your victim's satisfaction. While hubby was away she didn't take any of his calls.

Her aim was to confuse this man and disturb the couple's vacation. She wanted to bring the man's attention back to her.

She avoided all forms of communication with him. This she did to get him wondering where on earth she was. Her objective was to be in complete mastery of her man's heart. Her absence aroused innate insecurity in her man.

The thought that ruled Mr Molapo was that his wife was having an affair, which wasn't true at all. Suffice to say, the vacation was cut short and he came rushing home sooner than expected aiming to catch his wife red-handed.

"Coquettes are consummate teases, experts at arousing desire through an alluring attitude. They are essentially cold and distant creatures, should you ever get to know one well. You will sense her inner core of detachment and self-love.

"Coquettes can trap people emotionally and keep their victims in their clutches.

"This skill puts them in the ranks of the most effective seducers," offers Robert Greene in his book The Art of Seduction.

When you choose coquetry as a strategy, do away with jealousy, emotional intelligence will see you through such rough patches.

Control your emotions, then seduce! And that is how Mrs Molapo got her man to grovel back to their marriage bed.

Mahlobo is a seduction expert and relationship coach at Perfect Gal