Men must also come out about abuse
AS WE launch the 16 Days of Activism against Women and Child Abuse campaign, let us do so knowing that the motive behind it is to have a peaceful South Africa, free from abuse.
It is self-evident that this campaign was initiated with the objective of getting rid of unwanted conduct by men who see their women as punching bags and their children as subjects to be abused.
While I call for an end to domestic violence, I also would like to call on women not to abuse their men. Traditionally, the word abuse is associated with men, but this is not always the case.
There are lots of men who are subjected to emotional or physical abuse by their partners, but they are scared to come out.
This might sound a bit untrue, but there are men who have resorted to alcohol abuse as a way of wiping away their tears.
When they realise they have endured enough pain and they can't take it anymore, men end up killing their partners and their kids before killing themselves.
It is when this happens that we, as members of the community, start condemning the man's actions without bothering to check what led to it.
I call upon all men to come out about their abuse to avoid situations where innocent lives of children are taken away.
The police should also treat men with dignity and stop laughing at them when they try to report their abuse ordeals. Community members should not keep quiet when they see abuse and domestic violence. They must act and try to liberate the concerned family.
Let us all support the activism campaign and encourage an abuse-free society.
Reader letter, Malphia Honwane, Gottenburg eManyeleti
Memme
I know someone who is being abused by his wife but he does not think he is being abused. He cleans, cooks even wash his kids napkins while the wife is chilling with her friends and laughing. And one of the kid is not even his and he knows it and he is saying he does not have a problem with that. And the wife insults the man in front of the kids.I don't have a problem with a man who's helping his wife with the house chores but not when the wife is going to go out with his friends and the man of the house does all the house chores..
Report Abuse
Vhamsanda
Now I believe that women can use both the right and left sphere of the brain. You have my vote girl.Report Abuse
Socrates
@Memme...most men actually dont know when they are being abused because they believe they are the abuser. I know a police man in Alex who would actually go around his yard several times conteplating on entering because the big fat wife was at the gate waiting to hit him with warm klaps, another man would cut loan on a sunday whilt his wife was drinking JD with young men, but now they are divorced.There is an organisation that helps men in this state (eg, given back men their rights, and why should women pay for DNA tests, etc) called MOSHATE, any man who needs help, I can hook you up or email me on socrates2y@gmail.com
Report Abuse
tpaz
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife.Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy.
Make up sex after fighting is HOT.
Report Abuse
2virgins
All men are abused. Why do you think no man goes straight home after work. you have to go somewhere first, just to try and go home earl. you only get it because the madam says so.Report Abuse
Uhuru
@Memme, U have raised an important point, some men are blind. Traditionally a man like that would be suspected of having been given “rata nna fela”. It is alleged that women mix the dirt from their panties with food and feed the man. Upon eating, such a man will never see anything wrong with his wife.There was once a story that appeared in Soccer Laduma about a Northwest man and a popular Kaiser Chiefs star of the 80's & 90’s.
The man came home early as usual and started performing household cores. Upon hearing some funny noises from the bedroom, he went to investigate. He found the Chiefs star doing his usual tricks, unfortunately this time not in the field of play but on his wife. It is said the man screamed with delight repeatedly calling the star with his football nickname. He felt proud that a popular soccer star was in his house and said to the star “just wait”, he went out going to buy drinks for the football star but the star left b4 the man came back with the beers.
Report Abuse
RODMASH
ex-cop DISKY NGOBENI who murdered his wife on the 10th of november at MULATI VILLAGE must rot in jail irrespective of what led to him shooting his wife. there is no amount af hallucination that can justify why men ( DISKY NGOBEN in particular) should vent their frustration on vulnerable women.F*CK KILLERS,F*CK RAPISTS,F*CK MOLESTERS,F*CK PEDOPHILES, F*CK SH*T COPS AND F*CK DISKY NGOBENIReport Abuse
SEJA-MOTETE
Eish! indeed brothers get warm klaps from wives but prefer to die in silence becasue it is rather embarassing to complain or even lay charges with the police against your wife. They, police, will laugh at you when try to open a case for assault, instea they'll arrest you and start frequneting your house. Tough times we live in.@2virgins
I have to agree with you. Going home straight after work means you'll be grounded for that day, until of course the madam decides to give you visa to go out, but then you can only get permission once in a month if you're lucky, some of us get it at least once in three months but I make sure that I abuse it in all respects, if you get what I mean.
Report Abuse